Necessary Evil

Necessary Evil: something unpleasant that must be accepted in order to achieve a particular result. 

In this life we all will face necessary evils. Whether it be taxes or the agonizing pain of childbirth, necessary evils cannot be avoided. But what happens when we try to avoid these essential parts of life? What happens when we allow the fear of what is necessary and the pain or negative effect attached to it to stop us from reaching our desired result?  

Parenthood is a great example of this. During your child’s early days, months, and years there are many challenges to be faced to ensure the proper growth and development of your baby.   You have to get your son circumcised, you have to get them vaccinated, then there’s potty training and weaning from breasts or bottle. 

There’s that heart breaking first day at daycare so that you can get back to work or their first day at school so that they can receive the building blocks for education.  These are all necessary evils that if not carried out would result in an underdeveloped child. 

In my own personal life I’ve taken a look back at the necessary evils that I tried to avoid, one in particular being  the need to take time to get to know myself. How is this a necessary evil you may ask? Well, in taking time to really get to know ones self there’s a process of being alone of focusing only on ones self. Focusing on other people’s issues and drama  is much easier than focusing on yourself and all that comes with you. The good, the bad, and let’s not forget the ugly. But in order to be authentic, and to be whole, healed, and present it was necessary for me to stop throwing myself into incompatible relationships or unproductive friendships just to avoid the ache that came with my necessary evil. I had to embrace the ache to get me the results I have today. 

  There are some things in your life that are making you uncomfortable On Purpose. It’s to move you to your next level.  For if we’re not growing we’re dying and if we’re not moving we’re stagnant.

That girl on your job that’s sabotaging you, that taunts you and undermines your work. That boss that finds new ways to belittle and disrespect you. They are necessary for the entrepreneur in you to come forth.  They are a constant reminder of where you do not belong. 

 Single parents, your children growing out of their clothes and eating you out of house in home is necessary to push you back into the classroom to get the certificate, license, or degree it takes to make the salary to sustain your family and household. 

That situationship you’ve been in for the past 5 years; They do then they don’t. They will and then they won’t. It’s necessary so that you will become sick of the rollercoaster ride and toxic cycle of instability and insecurity. So that you become tired of child’s play and develop true desire for real companionship and being honored in a relationship. 

Friends that have betrayed you, told your secrets, maybe to your enemies. They were teaching you to take all your cares to God in prayer. He is the only one that can help you anyway. 

That person you trusted that abused you. Once you begin to walk in forgiveness, have just simultaneously anointed you. Because to forgive someone that isn’t sorry is a special gift from God carried out by the strongest of us. 

The pain we experienced from the necessary evils in this life will always carry a sting. There is a sting in disappointment, there is a bitterness in heartbreak, being victimized will always feel like someone just took all the air out the room. Sometimes we make poor choices and those consequences hurt.

I wanted to tell you life is full of necessary evils, don’t try to avoid them and miss out on getting what you can only receive by going through them.  You can handle the sting and the ache for it is strengthening you to become that person required to hold the end result. 

Peace and Blessings


  1. Wow! Let’s just take a moment to reflect on if we’re not growing we are dying and if we’re not moving we’re stagnant. That is deep truth right there. I would like you to do a spin off on just that right there. Awesome word once again.


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